Our Commonality Will Drive Us Apart
Anthropologists have now pinpointed what they believe to be a major instigating factor in what would come to be known as the infamous Bunny Revolution, which eventually cost the lives of more than four million people and 20 million bunnies in the early 21st Century.
Daniele Resicini is heartbroken after someone snuck onto his property and killed two of his bunnies.
Sometime between last Thursday night and Friday morning, the two baby rabbits were pulled from their secure cage and beaten.
“Someone came into my backyard and beat my two baby rabbits to death,” said Resicini. “I feel pretty violated because someone was in my yard — who does that?”
This is, by the way, only the first three of fifteen paragraphs in an exceedingly well-reported story about Bunny Murder. From Canada, of course; the Mounties were also on the scene.
Where I live, in Oakland, the actual human murders only get three grafs, one of which will always be: “Police had no further leads on the incident and are hoping witness will come forward with pertinent information.”
But hey! Bunnies!