Home > Everything Else > Come the New Anosognosics!

Come the New Anosognosics!

Fascinating article on…something or the other. In that home of all words that are sort of intriguing but also kind of baroque and unfathomable (which is not the same thing as fathomlessly) at the same time, the New York Times Opinion Section.

Which is written by uniquely intelligent howler monkeys, using special alpha wave brain scanners and automated text-to-grunt translation services, their howler monkey faces dabbed with lightly rose-scented hankies every five minutes to eliminate (or at least reduce, the theory goes) brain fatigue and upper lip sweat.

There’s even a side diversion into the melting point of beryllium, something normal howler monkeys would totally not even be speculating over. Did I mention that the part on beryllium is illustrated?

Wheeler had walked into two Pittsburgh banks and attempted to rob them in broad daylight.  What made the case peculiar is that he made no visible attempt at disguise.  The surveillance tapes were key to his arrest.  There he is with a gun, standing in front of a teller demanding money.  Yet, when arrested, Wheeler was completely disbelieving.  “But I wore the juice,” he said.  Apparently, he was under the deeply misguided impression that rubbing one’s face with lemon juice rendered it invisible to video cameras…As Dunning read through the article, a thought washed over him, an epiphany.  If Wheeler was too stupid to be a bank robber, perhaps he was also too stupid to know that he was too stupid to be a bank robber — that is, his stupidity protected him from an awareness of his own stupidity.

Andrew Sullivan finds a way to make this article about Sarah Palin.

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